Mary: Perpetual Virgin?

(Matthew 1:23 ESV) 23 “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us).

(John 2:12 ESV) After this he went down to Capernaum, with his mother and his brothers and his disciples, and they stayed there for a few days.

The Roman Catholic Church teaches as a dogma (a teaching that must be believed by faithful Catholics) that Mary, the mother of Jesus, was perpetually a virgin. They say that Mary remained a virgin after the birth of Jesus and for her whole life. But the plain reading of John 2:12 (and many other passages that refer to the siblings of Jesus) seems to debunk this dogma. Obviously, if Jesus had even one brother in the normal sense of the word then it would stand to reason that Mary did not remain a virgin. So, to maintain the doctrine of the perpetual virginity of Mary in the face of these passages Roman Catholics have offered a number of alternative understandings of the phrase “his brothers.” (I refer here to explanations given by private Catholics and/or popular Catholic apologists, not official Roman Catholic statements). For example, some have said that Joseph was married to another women before he married Mary and the “brothers” are the children of Joseph and his first wife. But most Roman Catholics argue that the word for “brothers” in the original language is broad enough to mean “cousins,” so the “brothers” are really the children of Mary’s sister. This is the preferred view because it saves Joseph’s virginity as well as Mary’s.

In response I would make seven points:

1). The “brothers” are always referred to as the brothers of Jesus and they are never called the sons of Joseph. This would be strange if their only connection to Jesus is that they were Joseph’s sons, because being Joseph’s sons would not make them the biological brothers of Jesus.

2). The “brothers,” whenever they appear in the Gospels, are always with Mary, which would be strange if they were the children of her husband and another woman.

3). The Greek word for “brothers” is the normal word for “brothers.”

While in certain contexts the word for "brothers" is used with a broader meaning such as kinsmen or even countrymen, the context always determines the meaning. There is a Greek word for cousins, but it is never used of this group’s relationship to Jesus. There is nothing in the context of John 2:12 or any other passage that refers to Jesus’ brothers to make one think it means anything other than “brothers.” Therefore, the Roman Catholic argues that “brothers” means cousins only because there is a predetermined perspective that says that Jesus had no siblings and this ultimately leads them to circular reasoning.

Imagine this conversation:

Evangelical: “John 2:12 says Jesus had brothers.”

Roman Catholic: “That means cousins.”

Evangelical: “How do you know that it means cousins?”

Roman Catholic: “Because Jesus didn’t have any brothers.”

Evangelical: “But the text says He did have brothers.”

Roman Catholic: “That means cousins.”

Evangelical: “How do you know that it means cousins?”

Roman Catholic: “Because Jesus didn’t have any brothers.”

So this is the kind of circular reasoning we encounter. To break this cycle the Evangelical must ask another question,

Evangelical: “How do you know that Jesus had no brothers?”

Roman Catholic: “Because Mary was perpetually a virgin.”

But this only broadens the circle of reason and a circle is a circle no matter how large. In other words Roman Catholics believe that the references to Jesus’ brothers must mean cousins because Mary was perpetually a virgin. So when you point out passages that speak of Jesus’ “brothers” it is automatically assumed that they are His cousins because Mary could not have had more children because she was perpetually a virgin. But the perpetual virginity of Mary is the very point that is at question. So they are using their conclusion, that Mary remained a virgin for her whole life, as the basis for their argument, that the references to Jesus’ “brother’s” means “cousins,” to prove their conclusion, that Mary remained a virgin for her whole life. That is the essence of circular reasoning.

Let’s take it one step further:

Evangelical: “How do you know that Mary was perpetually a virgin?”

Roman Catholic: “Because that is what the Church teaches.”

Evangelical: “The Bible says that Jesus had brothers.”

Roman Catholic: “That means cousins.”

Evangelical: “What makes you think that that means cousins?”

Roman Catholic: “Because Jesus did not have any siblings.”

Evangelical: “How do you know that Jesus did not have any siblings?”

Roman Catholic: “Because Mary was perpetually a virgin.”

Evangelical: “How do you know that Mary was perpetually a virgin?”

Roman Catholic: “Because that is the teaching of the Church.”

Ultimately then, for Catholics, the Bible does not determine what the Church teaches; the Church

determines what the Bible teaches. The final authority then is not the Bible but Rome.

4). The Bible nowhere teaches that Mary remained a virgin after the birth of Christ. To say that she did is an argument from silence. This argument from silence is defeated by the argument from the texts which teach that Jesus had siblings.

5). The Bible actually teaches that Mary did not remain a virgin after the birth of Jesus. It does so in the many references to Jesus’ siblings.

Also, Matthew 1:25 says that Joseph had no sexual relations with Mary “until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus” (ESV). The word “until” is significant. If I say to you, “Loan me $50 “until” Friday,” it means that, if you agree, a certain condition will exist from now to Friday. The condition will be that you are without $50 of your own money and that I am indebted to you for $50. Well then, how long will this condition last? This condition will last “until” Friday, at which time, if I am true to my promise, the condition will change. So the word “until” implies that at the end of the stated time the condition will change. Matthew 1:25 says that Joseph had no sexual relations with Mary “until she had given birth to a son.” I might break my promise to pay back your $50, but when Matthew said, “until she had given birth to a son,” he was writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit Who cannot lie.

6). Mary was far too godly to abstain from normal sexual relations in the context of marriage.

Paul the Apostle, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, commanded married couples: “Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control” (First Corinthians 7:5 ESV). Accordingly, for Mary to remain a virgin she would be sinning by depriving her husband the normal sexual relationship that is commanded in Scripture for married couples, and doing so would make Joseph unduly vulnerable to sexual temptation.

7). The belief that Mary was perpetually a virgin (as well as the celibate priesthood) seems to stem from the false assumption that virginity is somehow better or more spiritual than marriage. It certainly does not come from the biblical record.

For the Bible says, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous" (Hebrews 13:4 ESV).

John 2:12 says that Jesus had “brothers.” And “brothers” means brothers. Jesus had brothers because, after Jesus was born, Joseph and Mary experienced normal marital sexual relations. Mary did not perpetually remain a virgin.

Now tell me, doth this offend you?